Emotionally Drained

Today was a lot of emotions all rolled into one day, and I am drained.
A different vet was set to see Reeses this afternoon but they called me early this morning to get him there immediately. They emptied his bladder, he can't go on his own, and she told me she found an organization here in San Diego that could pay for Reeses to have back surgery. We rushed to the vet hospital and saw two neurologists who said he had a great chance of being 100% after surgery. Sadly the organization denied us because we make to much money, a military family makes to much money are you freak'n kidding me?! So of course we can not afford the surgery, guess what the total cost was for him... $6,000. It kills me that we can't do the surgery, but life goes on.

I am fully confident that he will be great one day even though all the vets we have seen said to put him down. I am not cruel, he is in no pain. Trust me if he was suffering I would make that choice if there was absolutely nothing we could do. Reeses is his old self, he even played today! Now tell me that is a dog that needs to be put down, come on! He may not be able to wag his tail but he smiles with his eyes. Also yesterday he couldn't feel a thing, but today if I touched his feet he turned to look at them. Tonight he attacked some grass that touched them, that gives me hope.

So what does this mean for us? It means when he wants to go outside I have to hold up his bottom so it doesn't drag, and I even have to express his bladder and bowels. It's not glamorous but I will do it for him. I'm still not very good at it, but we are trying our best. Tonight I walked with him as he sniffed the yard like any normal dog, my back is killing me but the joy on his face was worth it. We were told to wait a bit for a wheelchair because he may end up not needing it, but we will see where he is in two weeks and go from there.